[ something changes in nisaka's expression then. softens into something almost intangible, like hope personified, because here he had just been, thinking of his luck in finally getting all he's ever wanted, and then kuroo comes back in to reassure him there's still so much more he hadn't ever considered.
he swallows down the apprehension in his gut, that knee-jerk reaction of this is too good to be true, so of course something has to fuck it all up. instead he is biting down on a lip to ward off another shy smile, turning away just so he can walk on over to the bed and perch along the edge of it. away from the door, kuroo had said, and he'd caught the boy looking at the bed earlier so — why not? why not?
he sits there expectantly, staring up at the other with wide, hopeful eyes. he settles a hand on the spot beside him, but says no more than that, waiting to see if kuroo thinks he's overstepped in any way. ]
[ The bed, huh? Kuroo supposes it's only natural to want to make out on a bed, given that the only other surfaces in Kuroo's room are the floor and a desk, but somehow he'd never even dared to imagine that Nisaka would just walk on up there and sit so expectantly, waiting for him. It's a fantasy come true, really, and Kuroo does an absolutely piss poor job at disguising how quickly he scurries over to sit beside him. ]
You're gonna have to.. tell me if you wanna stop. [ This is both Kuroo confessing to the fact that he's not sure he's going to be able to ever stop kissing Nisaka once he stops, and also that he'll have no idea how to read his best friend once they're actually kissing. He's confessing to this with bright red ears and a pink face, which is making the serious warning seem more like a flustered confession from an emotionally overwhelmed goober, but.. Nisaka probably doesn't mind, right? ] Uncle won't work so, uh. Punch me in the arm or push me away or something, okay?
[ Before he's given Nisaka chance to respond and even before gets his ass on the bed he's kissing Nisaka again, locking their lips together then prying his open, tongue delving into his mouth and drinking in the taste and feel of his best friends mouth with a fair amount more awareness than last time, but also a great deal more ease as now there's no chance of uninvited interruptions of any kind to stop them and their.. ahem.. practising. ]
[ kuroo's word of warning is... necessary. practical, really. but it still draws a small sound from nisaka, something strangled between a gasp and a grunt. his lips part, his eyes widen, and his cheeks glow a pink similar to the other's, but unlike the other he is kept mute throughout it all, far too horrified at the heavy pulse of blood in his veins to even put a voice to it.
what makes you think i'll want to stop? is what he doesn't get to say, thankfully, because how embarrassing is that, how desperate is that, which is a strange thing to worry about after all that's been said and done.
not that he has much time to worry about it. soon enough, kuroo's kissing him again, and there's a tongue in his mouth, mapping out the lines of his teeth, and he has to fight now to keep other equally embarrassing sounds from escaping. he leans up into it as eagerly as it came to him, shifting a bit on the bed so he's facing his friend more easily. their legs bump awkwardly, and his hand winds up falling just a little above kuroo's knee for steadiness, and then he's sucking on his best friend's lower lip with way less reservation than he had before. ]
[ If Kuroo had been using his brain for anything other than selfish gain then he might have had the foresight to perhaps switch on the TV or play some kind of music to muffle the almost obscene noises their mouths make together.. but he didn't and so they echo in the room and rattle around Kuroo's head and basically act as some kind of torture device directed specifically at all those soft feelings he'd been having over getting to kiss his best friend, driving him instead straight toward all those teenage hormones again. How do people do it, he wonders. How in the world do people who are attracted to one another manage to withstand these kinds of feelings long enough to wait for an appropriate time, to not come off as totally seedy???
The noises coming from Nisaka and the lips closing around his don't help any, because the combination assaults Kuroo's senses with mental images of Nisaka's little pink tongue and his flushed face, of the faint line of his collar bone through his thin sleep shirt and those hands tugging at the hem, pulling it down across his lap... Phew. He feels like he needs another walk outside at this rate.
He doesn't even realise he's been making noises until he draws away from Nisaka for air and interrupts a gasp coming from his own mouth with a low groan of frustration at his own capacity. Had those moaning sounds been coming from him? Had they been loud? Shit. Sorry mom.
He licks his lips, looking over Nisaka's face for a moment as though looking for a green light, and then sealing their kiss again moments later. He feels like he should explain himself, explain what he's experiencing.. but that would require both him to be aware of what it is, exactly, that he's experiencing and also enough willpower not to continue to kiss him. Kuroo is weak to the latter of course. ]
[ when kuroo becomes the first to draw away, nisaka is both disappointed and relieved. so much of this is still tentative, that he had literally been holding his breath and ready to die like that just to avoid having to draw away prematurely, or doing anything else prematurely. all the movies and tv shows just kind of — show it happening. from one kiss to another, to suddenly clothes off and mutual writhing on the bed.
it's an attractive thought, but real life is so very often unlike what media will have you believe (discounting the last few days of his life, thanks) and, okay, frankly nisaka is just terrified of fucking up, even now, even after the scariest part is, supposedly, over. should he say something? should he not? he can kind of tell from the eager way kuroo kisses him back that if he were to make any kind of moves towards that particular path, he would more than readily follow.
but is that fair to kuroo? is that what he really wants, or is he just going along with it because it's what nisaka himself wants?
all these thoughts clouding up his mind, he forgets to try and hold his breath again, and this time he's the one to draw away with a sharp gasp, breathing heavily against kiss-red lips. ]
Do you care? [ he winces at how it sounds almost as soon as it comes out of his mouth. his hands curl around the front of kuroo's shirt as if half afraid his fumbling would drive the other boy away. ] About h-how it... happens...
[ god. god. he grimaces again but this time out of pure agony and embarrassment. he can feel his entire face burning, just trying to broach this topic that maybe? they should have considered before all this? before nisaka found himself getting addicted to the way kuroo's tongue feels stuffed down his throat, and thoughts of other things going down there flooding up his mind as well. what if he's being too presumptuous? is that a sign of conceit? of his own depravity? he's floundering here, wanting to clear the air because he wants to do this right, but at the same time he finds himself already missing the taste of his best friend on his tongue. ]
[ Well. Kuroo goes from being concerned about coming off as seedy, to tripping and falling straight into not giving a single shit. Nisaka kissing him back is enough confirmation that he wants this, that much is clear... but how much he wants, if he wants what Kuroo wants and in what way is a different question that has been burning like a brand on Kuroo's tongue as he pushes it into Nisaka's mouth. Thankfully, as somehow always seems to be the case, Nisaka takes all those worries away with a look and a few words. Only this time his look is heated and overwhelmed, and the words go straight to Kuroo's dick. ]
Shit. [ Kuroo breathes out accidentally, just because this is a lot and it's so good and Kuroo is terrified of saying what's on his mind - no, I don't care, I just want it now, whatever it is - but is also terrified of holding back for fear that it'll get to a point where he can't.
He closes his eyes, licks his lips (which doesn't really help because all he can taste there is Nisaka), and exhales a forcibly slow breath before looking at his... at Nisaka again. ]
I feel like I should take you on a date or something first, you know? I feel kind of bad I'm not.. doing this properly, but.. [ His eyes flick down, landing somewhere around Nisaka's waist before flitting back up again. ] But I.. [ His gaze has landed on Nisaka's mouth, his glistening lips and his worried expression, and Kuroo exhales again like it's the only way he's maintaining self composure. ]
[ nisaka isn't sure when his face started heating up to the point of nuclear, but he's definitely well aware of it by the time kuroo stops speaking. ]
Don't say such embarrassing things, [ he grouses, but he doesn't bother to clarify what "thing" he considers embarrassing. (all of it. the answer is all of it.) the simple tees kuroo has such an affinity for provide no easy source of anchorage for nisaka to properly hoist himself, but he makes do with what fabric he can grab a hold of anyway, twisting on a knee on the bed so that in the next (clumsy) second, he's effectively straddled his best friend's lap.
he takes care to perch low enough on kuroo's lap not to be completely reckless, but there's definitely no misreading his intent with this particular move. he may or may not have dared himself to do it; to be sure, he wants this too, but he knows it would have taken him another decade to get anywhere if he didn't force himself to take initiative like this now.
[ Kuroo doesn't realize he's said anything for a long moment, the words just coming out with an exhale, because his head is reeling with the oh-shit-ness of it all. Nisaka just slung a leg over his lap and is now sitting in his lap, looking down at him with kiss bruised lips that are practically begging to be kissed again, with mussed up hair and hot eyes and the unmistakable signs of a person who would like very much to get in some way hot and heavy with his best friend.
Kuroo isn't sure if he should pinch himself or put his hand to his nose to check for bleeding. It's then that he seems to realize he's spoken, and his hands come up to anchor on either side of Nisaka's hips as he nods an affirmative. ] Yeah.
[ He doesn't know how far this is going to go, exactly, or even if it will actually go anywhere past a bit of clumsy grinding given how much of a hair-trigger Kuroo feels right now.. but he's ready for it, whatever it is.
He leans up to kiss Nisaka again, struck suddenly by how their size difference - both in height and width - feels so much less when they are kissing, when Kuroo's eyes are closed and all he has to focus on is the feeling of the warm skin of Nisaka's back through his shirt. ]
[ he feels a flare of regret the second it hits them both just how drastic and bold nisaka's gesture had been. the urge to crawl into the darkest hole and die there is strong, but before he can even think to move away and take it all back, a pair of strong hands made rougher from a summer's worth of intensive sports training's got him weighted down. he's keenly aware of the fact his hips are just a few inches short of being flush with kuroo's, and he's a little dizzy from how much his mind oscillates between the desire to scoot closer and discover if there's something to find there, or slide back until he's falling on the ground and can blame a broken hip on his sudden inability to process anything properly.
they're kissing again, and nisaka is left to wonder why they had waited so long to do this. kissing is definitely amazing and kuroo knows what he's doing. nisaka's positive all he's doing is stumbling along, attempting to catch up, but he hopes his sloppiness and inexperience is made up for by his enthusiasm, hands slipping up over broad shoulders before finally burying into those thick tufts of wild hair he can never make sense of. he quickly finds his new favorite thing to do is suck on that pouty lower lip of kuroo's only to leave delicate little marks with his teeth. kuroo's skin flushes so easily there, and it leaves nisaka wondering where else in kuroo's body he gets so pink and swollen and
oh fuck it. he can feel his thighs clench and seize up from his meager restraint; he's gone this far, what's a few more inches? the shuffling itself seems louder than he would have liked it to be, all bedsheets and jeans disagreeing with each other. but soon enough he has nothing else to think of but the fact he's sitting on kuroo, he's sitting on kuroo, he's sitting on kuroo, he's sitting on kuroo. the faint pressure and friction between them is enough to draw out a startled moan from his lips, too sharp to have any hope of being buried between their lips. he guesses this is how he dies. oh well. he lived a good life, he supposes. rip. ]
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You're gonna have to.. tell me if you wanna stop. [ This is both Kuroo confessing to the fact that he's not sure he's going to be able to ever stop kissing Nisaka once he stops, and also that he'll have no idea how to read his best friend once they're actually kissing. He's confessing to this with bright red ears and a pink face, which is making the serious warning seem more like a flustered confession from an emotionally overwhelmed goober, but.. Nisaka probably doesn't mind, right? ] Uncle won't work so, uh. Punch me in the arm or push me away or something, okay?
[ Before he's given Nisaka chance to respond and even before gets his ass on the bed he's kissing Nisaka again, locking their lips together then prying his open, tongue delving into his mouth and drinking in the taste and feel of his best friends mouth with a fair amount more awareness than last time, but also a great deal more ease as now there's no chance of uninvited interruptions of any kind to stop them and their.. ahem.. practising. ]
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The noises coming from Nisaka and the lips closing around his don't help any, because the combination assaults Kuroo's senses with mental images of Nisaka's little pink tongue and his flushed face, of the faint line of his collar bone through his thin sleep shirt and those hands tugging at the hem, pulling it down across his lap... Phew. He feels like he needs another walk outside at this rate.
He doesn't even realise he's been making noises until he draws away from Nisaka for air and interrupts a gasp coming from his own mouth with a low groan of frustration at his own capacity. Had those moaning sounds been coming from him? Had they been loud? Shit. Sorry mom.
He licks his lips, looking over Nisaka's face for a moment as though looking for a green light, and then sealing their kiss again moments later. He feels like he should explain himself, explain what he's experiencing.. but that would require both him to be aware of what it is, exactly, that he's experiencing and also enough willpower not to continue to kiss him. Kuroo is weak to the latter of course. ]
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Shit. [ Kuroo breathes out accidentally, just because this is a lot and it's so good and Kuroo is terrified of saying what's on his mind - no, I don't care, I just want it now, whatever it is - but is also terrified of holding back for fear that it'll get to a point where he can't.
He closes his eyes, licks his lips (which doesn't really help because all he can taste there is Nisaka), and exhales a forcibly slow breath before looking at his... at Nisaka again. ]
I feel like I should take you on a date or something first, you know? I feel kind of bad I'm not.. doing this properly, but.. [ His eyes flick down, landing somewhere around Nisaka's waist before flitting back up again. ] But I.. [ His gaze has landed on Nisaka's mouth, his glistening lips and his worried expression, and Kuroo exhales again like it's the only way he's maintaining self composure. ]
But I don't think I can wait that long.
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[ Kuroo doesn't realize he's said anything for a long moment, the words just coming out with an exhale, because his head is reeling with the oh-shit-ness of it all. Nisaka just slung a leg over his lap and is now sitting in his lap, looking down at him with kiss bruised lips that are practically begging to be kissed again, with mussed up hair and hot eyes and the unmistakable signs of a person who would like very much to get in some way hot and heavy with his best friend.
Kuroo isn't sure if he should pinch himself or put his hand to his nose to check for bleeding. It's then that he seems to realize he's spoken, and his hands come up to anchor on either side of Nisaka's hips as he nods an affirmative. ] Yeah.
[ He doesn't know how far this is going to go, exactly, or even if it will actually go anywhere past a bit of clumsy grinding given how much of a hair-trigger Kuroo feels right now.. but he's ready for it, whatever it is.
He leans up to kiss Nisaka again, struck suddenly by how their size difference - both in height and width - feels so much less when they are kissing, when Kuroo's eyes are closed and all he has to focus on is the feeling of the warm skin of Nisaka's back through his shirt. ]
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they're kissing again, and nisaka is left to wonder why they had waited so long to do this. kissing is definitely amazing and kuroo knows what he's doing. nisaka's positive all he's doing is stumbling along, attempting to catch up, but he hopes his sloppiness and inexperience is made up for by his enthusiasm, hands slipping up over broad shoulders before finally burying into those thick tufts of wild hair he can never make sense of. he quickly finds his new favorite thing to do is suck on that pouty lower lip of kuroo's only to leave delicate little marks with his teeth. kuroo's skin flushes so easily there, and it leaves nisaka wondering where else in kuroo's body he gets so pink and swollen and
oh fuck it. he can feel his thighs clench and seize up from his meager restraint; he's gone this far, what's a few more inches? the shuffling itself seems louder than he would have liked it to be, all bedsheets and jeans disagreeing with each other. but soon enough he has nothing else to think of but the fact he's sitting on kuroo, he's sitting on kuroo, he's sitting on kuroo, he's sitting on kuroo. the faint pressure and friction between them is enough to draw out a startled moan from his lips, too sharp to have any hope of being buried between their lips. he guesses this is how he dies. oh well. he lived a good life, he supposes. rip. ]